It can seem like we have very to little control over who we meet, and we have even less control over how they show up for us or not. We have very little control over how long they stay in our lives.

Take dating for example. So many single people complain that they just can’t seem to find the “right” person, no matter how far or long they’ve searched. People who move to new areas can have a hard time transitioning, because who we connect with and socialize with is an extremely important part of our wellbeing. When you’re looking for your person or your tribe, it can be hard to know where to start.

The best place to begin is with your own vision. Before you go out looking for connections, it’s imperative to know what you really want to connect to. If you don’t enjoy reading books, going to the library to scope out a quiet spot for a kind companion isn’t your best bet. If you don’t want to attract people in your life who drink, going to a bar to meet a potential partner is a wrong move. Define what you want before you go hunting.

Yet, on a deeper level, we do go beyond defining what we want, into being in and functioning out of the vibration that we want to attract. This is tricky but it is the fastest way to manifest and build a new dream or expand an existing one.

To succeed in anything – a relationship, a career, a startup business, a sports match – it takes building bocks of learning, practicing, making mistakes and learning from them, getting back up after failures and trying again, and it absolutely takes having the right people around you in the form of mentorship and a support system.

It takes a long time if you start dating someone to get to know them, right? When it comes to attracting the right people it can seem like it takes forever. It’s hard to know right upfront who you can trust to mentor you or to show up and support you when it matters.

There is a faster way to get what you want when you know what you want. When it comes to the people in our life, one of the easiest ways to know what we want is to write it down. If we could have any kind of spouse, client(s), friends, family members – what qualities do we desire in others? What do we need from these people to make the relationship feel ideal.

Identify and Write Down What You Are Attracted To and What You Want To Attract

When you think about what and who you are normally attracted to, does that match up with what you want to attract to yourself?

Make two lists. See how well they match.

Personally, I will admit that the old me would have two very different lists, except in the friend area of my life. With dating – I had been attracted to the “bad boy” type, or the “starving artist” type which had a lot of cross over. What I always wanted to attract was stability and honesty in a partner. Now, those lists match more closely in all areas of my life.

If you do write down these qualities, you can do this for many different areas of life. With friends, we may value the same things in friendship like honestly and loyalty, fun and support, but is that what we have primarily attracted in the way of friendships? If not, why?

In many cases, the older we get, the more the lists do match because the bad relationships do tend to burn out and people break up or move on in life to new jobs or new friends or a new marriage, etc. But who wants to wait until they get older to attract who and what they want?

There’s a Faster Way to Attract What and Who You Want in Your Life

Here’s where we start to make use of new knowledge and new energies. We don’t have to fear new energies even though the media and our culture makes it seem like things such as AI are going to take over everything…humans are still in control, no worries. Learn how to work with the new energy and the new technology to advance and expand your capabilities as a human.

You’re simply moving into a higher vibrational frequency and it’s then easier to pick up vibrational matches.

That’s the shift that is needed to build the life of your dreams. Here, this blog focuses on the part where we attract who we want. We do not do this with our thoughts, rather we start in the mind because everything does start with a thought, an idea. Moving into a higher vibration is done through visualization and imagination more than hardline thinking in terms of sentences.

Visualize yourself with the partner that you would love to be with, or with there kind of clients that come into your business and vibe with you and appreciate you, or the kind of sibling that embraces you and supports you wholeheartedly – it can be hard to visualize when your “real life” has never been like that.

Think of it like you’re just creating a movie or a book where you’re the main character and it’s fiction and you get the life of your dreams. Feel what that feels like. When you daydream it up in your imagination you should feel elated, just like when you’re having a fabulous dream. The energy should feel exciting and expansive, and that’s what to hone in on. Once that energy, that life-giving, exciting energy fills you up, try to stay with it throughout every moment of your day.

The higher vibrational energies are available to us, and at the same time, they wax and wane with our 3-dimensional frequencies that we have been anchored into our entire lives. We are going to get sunk in that dense 3-D energy as soon as we have to deal with things in the 3-D world, like the situations we would love to change, and when dealing with circumstances that feel stressful and not like the invigorating energy and higher vibration of our ideal life.

We are all new to working with these new energies because the planet has not had them before in our lifetimes. We can see this in a tangible way with how far technology has come I the last 100 years – it’s really fabulously accelerated but it’s hard for us to see that when we are in it. This is new to all of us, and we are all cable of using the new advances to help mankind. The first step is learning to use them in your own life, in your own living room.

Self Esteem Plays a Huge Role in Attracting the Right People and Circumstances

There are so many facets of life and dealing with others that we can’t control, and that’s another tricky part to getting what we want in life when it comes to attracting who we want. We can only control ourselves, and our self esteem plays an integral part in how we attract what we attract. Misery loves company. We already know the typical way our culture and our relationship habits work. We have to break free from the old patterns and the old energy.

Before we can attract what we want, we have to be that shining beacon. If we are dimmed out and numbed out and experiencing low energy, that’s what is going to be seen and that’s what is going to appear for us in response to us. We have to feel good to attract good. We have to like ourselves to attract people who are going to like us and support us for who we are and the vibration we bring. A victim will attract victims. An overachiever will attract an overachiever.

To attain the level of self esteem needed to attract other confident people who will be a source of support and a source of relief – they won’t drain you if they are the right people – circle right back around to the vision of the life of your dreams, the energy and excitement of that energy, and just keep focusing on that vibration and that exciting expansive energy. Keep “sitting in it”. Once you carry and walk in that energy, the world around you will respond. Be the change to get the change.

Now, you may be thinking, “Ok yeah, easier said than done. I would love to have self confidence and love all over myself, but I can’t just snap my fingers and wave a magic wand to be there now. I’m struggling to get everything done in my life to even have time to think about myself.” Just know that is where so many of us are at because the is the way our culture has been set up. We are busy.

The only way to break free from 3-D and go into more of a way of life that we can use the higher 5-D energies to manifest quickly is to break free from what we have known. Younger people have no problem, they were born into the higher frequency, so people in their 20s and younger will easily avoid the distraction of feeling like they have to live their life the way “society” wants them to. For anyone over the age of 35, we have a lot of breaking free to do.

It takes believing that you will attain the life of your dreams. You will live in that energy and that frequency of your vision. You deserve that and it is perfectly attainable. Because you read blogs like this – you’re already most of the way there. All it takes is being open. And we have to guide one another through this shift.

Share Any New Information You Get With People Who Understand You

If you get or intuit new information, do share. We are all in this together. It’s also how you will attract the right people to you. They will speak this language as well and understand you, and connect with you on this level. It’s the same frequency we were getting into in 2006, for example, when the self-help book The Secret came out, and there were publications like that through the 90s starting to emerge.

The difference, a few decades later, is that there are more intense more expansive energies on the planet to work with that can aid us in manifesting faster if we know how to use these energies. I’ve seen a big increase in the number of people attending sound baths and going to a sound therapist over the past one year alone. That tells me people are very open to using natural forces and vibrations and they are drawn to it without knowing why.

This energy is also in other cultures like people who play golf, for example. There’s energy and philosophy and natural forces and dynamics in every aspect of human life that a person could want to excel at or experiment with. Whether we are talking about golf, and how to “swing free” and get to the next level with driving or we are talking about meditation and how to “drop in” and get to another level with consciousness – we’re talking about the same thing – honing in on, connecting to, and merging with universal, natural forces to create and manifest higher vibrational outcomes.

Share the information with your neighbors, friends, colleagues, family, etc. because we’re moving into a time of helping one another. We don’t need to keep in the vibration of competition. We are moving into an understating that there is plenty enough room for everyone to succeed, and there are plenty enough resources on this planet that no human should be without food and shelter. Self esteem increases when we feel the connection.

Be kind to yourself.

The Wrong People May Be “Good” People and They Will Leave

When you attract the right people and the right circumstances the “wrong” people will go away. This can be very jarring. It can be emotionally painful. At the same time, keep in mind that emotional pain is from the old vibration of the 3-D world we are all used to navigating in. We don’t have to drop into the emotional pain now. In the newer vibration, we can simply understand that as we stay in the new vibration, the dense stuff will settle to the bottom and it doesn’t have to weigh us down.

The dense stuff at the bottom can be denser crystals of light that have value and are “good” in the 3-D realm where you once functioned with them as light, fun friends and/or co-workers, for example. Just because something settled out and away from you, even if it left in a violent and seemingly angry way – doesn’t mean the thing or person is innately bad or bad for you. It means that a frequency shift happened that caused a quake and a riff that pulled one in one direction and the other in another direction.

What falls away can still be something that was and is positive, but it just isn’t in the current, life-giving vision and expanded energy that you are honing in on. It’s completely ok if people that were once pretty good friends suddenly start appearing to be very irrational once you start going into the higher vibration of your own dream building and manifesting. You look irrational to them too.

Be kind to yourself through this. It can feel like you must be doing something wrong because all of a sudden a bunch of people have an issue or become upset with you, while at the same time your life is aligning perfectly and the right people are starting to show up in better ways than you could have ever imagined.

If you relax and just release any need to control the reactions of others, what you can start to notice is that the person reacting to you is in a different frequency and they’re reacting to something much different in their own realm, in their win vibration, than what it appears to be from your angle. They are going through their own “stuff” and it’s the stuff of the 3-D realm, where reactions to the 5-D realm are 3-D reactions of stress, worry, fear, anxiety, competition and mostly the fear of being rejected and left behind when they feel you expanding.

You will start to notice the 5-D world appearing and reacting to you. People who you admire and respect start to admire and respect you. Imagine that, literally, imagine it and feel that excitement, because that is actually what starts to happen when you function out of the higher frequency that you yourself derived and expanded into by having that expanded vision – using your imagination and knowing you deserve the life of your dreams.

Allow it to unfold, allow this to happen for you. Stay with the invigorating energy of how it feels when you’re celebrating your successes in a room full of your biggest supporters and most amazing inner circle people and you’re so happy for their successes as well. Keep finding that higher vibration and staying with it throughout as much of every day as possible.